Well, I wish I had received better news than this. We have a June 4th submission date. Wait a minute, didn't I tell you all our dossier was submitted in February. Well, that's what was told to our agency and that's what we were told. Now, the facilitator comes back today and says we have a this new date.
OK, so what's that problem, we now have a date. Well, our entire dossier will have to be redone because the last updates were in January. This means that I need to get an updated HS done, physicals done again along with lab tests, everything re-notarized and apostilled.
So again I say, what's the problem. Nevada apostilles take 7-10 working days but I can get them expedited. I've spent over $1K getting documents expedited and nothing to show for it. I would have to spend at least another $600 to get these expedited and could cost more depending on how long everything else takes.
So, I think that this could be possible if I dropped everything else. I run my own business and this week is filled with critical timing for my clients so now I have a further dilema, loose my clients and pursue the adoption (no way to now pay for it) or look at other options. I no longer trust our facilitator to get the job done so that leaves me with finding another facilitator who could submit us this year. I could let him submit it then try and change facilitators, but the atmosphere in Ukraine, I feel, is rather hostile right now to IA. This adoption is at the top of our priority list, but we still have to be reasonable about our decisions.
So tonight, Virginia and I are going to look at the options and decide. We may choose another country and cut our losses here. My heart has been in Ukraine for several years now, why I don't understand. Though it is still there, we may end up going to a different country. We may stay the route and see if we can get a later submission date. No matter what way we go, we will have to redo our complete dossier.
We need to take some time and decide what is the best possible way to go. This will be a hard decision. :( It seems that all I've been doing lately is venting but there is an upside. Virginia's brother and family are going to Mexico in June for a vacation. It's a wonderful place on the Carribean side that we've been to before and love. They've been hounding us to come along and we've been in limbo since we didn't know when we would be traveling. Well, it's now decided; we need a vacation and time away so we are going. We get to hang with a wonderful family and this should rejuvenate us for whatever is coming next.
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13 comments:
Oh my. I'm so very sorry Chris and Virginia. I'll email you offline.
To be honest, this doesn't sound like the kind of facilitator you want taking you through this adoption.
My advice (it's free, no charge lol), is talk with another facilitator NOW. Have the new facilitator check the list at the SDA to confirm your name is scheduled to be submitted on this new date. If so, you would immediately send a POA Nullification (for the old facilitator) and a new POA for the new facilitator, AND a letter to the SDA confirming this date , letting them know you have switched facilitation teams but will still be submitting on such and such date (do not tell your old facilitator until you know the SDA has this information). We had to do this (but in our case we were able to be open with facilitator number one, our reasons were much different).
If you can get your dossier updated in time, why not go for it, you have come this far.
The submission date is assigned to the family NOT the facilitator, so it is YOURS not his.
If you want suggestions about facilitators, feel free to email me. This is our second adoption and we have worked with 5 facilitators now (lol, no we are not facilitator hoppers, we have good reasons).
Best wishes!
Ukimom has some good advice.
I can't tell you how angry/frustrated/upset this makes me feel for you!! You guys will find the right path for your family. Adoption is definitely a test in patience. Please try to just hang on...and enjoy yourselves on vacation!
You did much. It will a pity, if you will displace from this way. Yes, SDA and our government directed on internal adoption now. But it is exteriority only. Inflation and not stability is not instrumental in adoption up country. Think, please, about the Ukrainian children. In any case, God will send you. I pray Him about you.
I have been watching your blog. This sounds so much like our story from October. If you will read our blog you will see that is what we were told in October. But praise God we continued with our quest and we have an appointment on July 11. I know it can be very hard to wait and start over again. Of course our paperwork was not as hard as your seems to be. Our apostille can be done overnight and the cost is free after you spend the 1st one hundred dollars. I am so sorry for your frustration. I hope that God shows you the direction to continue into soon.
Tammy
Guess I should tell you our blog address. www.huckabeeadoption.blogspot.com
I'm new to your blog. Oh, goodness...this story sounds WAY too familiar, except ours was almost 2 years ago, now. My heart goes out to you! But, I can also tell you if Ukraine is still where you're supposed to adopt from, it is entirely possible to get the dossier done in 2 weeks. We actually did our final one in less than that...most of it in the course of an afternoon, actually. We've also been through a rather nasty facilitator change. Ukimom had some great advice. I can give you even more if you're interested.
One thing I can tell you is that if your heart is in Ukraine, there is likely a reason for it. Despite a first corrupt facilitator who put us in a simlar position as you, we still went back and after many thousands of $$$ and 5 long years of riding the Hades Express, we were finally able to adopt 2 boys from Ukraine last summer. Though we'll soon be changing our blog url (we'll leave a way for interested families to keep following, though) the current link is in my profile. We've been blogging since long before we left and regularly since we've been home.
Best wishes as you make your decision! Don't let the money get in the way. If your kids are in Ukraine, the way WILL be opened for you to bring them home. In the meantime, enjoy your vacation.
How frustrating!!! I heard only good things about your facilitator (and especially about your agency), but when I interviewed him, I didn't like the way he talked to me, so I didn't hire him. Anyway, if I were you, I would try to update your dossier if possible so that it's submitted on June 4th. Even if you change facilitators now, likely you won't be able to submit until the next year.
It will probably sound cliche, but everything happens for the reason. You'll be able to go to a much needed vacation, you'll spend much less money for tickets in the fall, and finally your child(ren) will be available then!
Hang on there, you are very close!
We faced a lot of re-dos and just got the documents out today to the Sec. of State and hopefully to Ukraine by our submission date of June 2nd. It is possible. I re-gathered and had things updated in about 4 days. It is also a real test of your sanity. I hope you stick with it and realize that it can be done. The last FED/EX I sent to Kiev got there in 3 days. I hope that helps. Heather
I pray that God helps you make your decision! You have to do what is right for your family - try not to worry about the money (that's hard to do though).
Staci
Chris and Virginia,
I am so sorry to hear of your disappointment. We too debated continuing for several months (not because of our facilitator but because of the increasing number of families coming home without children). If you decide to continue with Ukraine, please call me, 314-724-0287, at anytime, I have some very good news for you that may allow you to switch to a Christian facilitator and a method we used to avoid expediated costs. You are in our prayers. Monica
We submitted our dossier in April. I was in Ukraine in March and went to the SDA because I wanted to see "the list" in person, with my name on it. It is posted outside the building. The list is by family. If you have a June submission date, your name will be on that list that was posted this month. If the same procedure continues then in June they will post a new list of families submitting in July. So if a facilitator tells you that "he" has submittal date for later in the year, do not trust him. Families are given places in line and submittal dates, not facilitators. From what I understand when I was over there, the only exceptions being made to the current number/line system is for special needs children.
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