Happy Halloween.
Not much is happening. We had to expedite some paperwork changes today, but still in a holding pattern.
We've been tagged by Christine so here we go:
Job's We've had in our lives:
Virginia
Security (Casino and Hotel)
Bookkeeper
Office Mgr
Chris
Gas Station Attendant
TV Repair
Electronic Tech
Casino Security
USAF - Played with things that go boom
Computer Network Architect/Admin
Places We have lived:
Virginia
Maryland
Kentucky
Colorado
Missouri
Texas
US
Nevada
New Mexico
California
South Dakota
Germany
I never realized that we've moved around this much. Could be because both of us are military brats.
TV shows We like to watch:
Virginia
CSI, any of them
Dancing with the Stars
Law and Order
Any Forensic Shows
Are your being served (British)
Eureka
Chris
Usually some History, Travel and National Geographic channel.
Occasionally South Park when I'm waiting to go to sleep
Eureka
Places We've been to:
US
Too many to list but not enough to make us want to stay at home.
Favorite Foods:
Virginia
Chris' Spaghetti
Bratwurst mit Brotchen
Pizza
German foods (She was starting to list a bunch)
Chris
All food, I love to eat. Just don't tell me what's in it till after I've tried it.
I don't do broccoli.
Books We've read in the last 5 years:
Virginia
Too many. Favorite authors are Brian Lumley, Steven King, Raymond Fiest, Robin Cook
Chris
Raymond Fiest, Fantasy and reference books. I read what catches my eye.
Things We enjoy:
Virginia
Spending time with Chris
Crafts - Crochet, Beading, Embroidery, etc.
Rock Hounding
Reading and TV
Diet Sprite
Chris
Spending time with Virginia
Browsing the Internet for information
Photography and Photoshop
Rock Hounding
60's - 70's music
Diet Coke
I'll have to look around to see who to tag; can't think of anyone off the top of my head.
Real quite Halloween as usual. We don't get anyone at our door or on our street for that matter.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Monday, October 29, 2007
Awareness
The more I learn, The more I realize the less I know.
Awareness is empowering unless you get too much in too short of time. I can’t begin to tell you how many hours I’ve spent trying to learn all I can in preparation for this journey. Especially in the early stages of research, I would get discouraged thinking of all the things that could go wrong. All the costs, all the conditions that the children may have, all the paperwork that has to be nearly perfect to be accepted, all the closures and foreign laws that can effect the progress, all these and more tugging at a question, why? Then I read a story of a family that brought home their angel, pulled from the depths of institutional care, becoming a family in the end. Then I wonder why I asked why.
This turned out to be a rather long intro to some links from where you can find more information. There are so many more resources that I’m unaware of, but I hope these links will help the newcomer. Please don’t hesitate to let me know of others that would be helpful here.
I’m currently reading “Attaching in Adoption” by Deborah Gray. It’s so much more than just telling about the issues that many children have, but describes human nature and some ideas on how to deal with these issues. Our society loves to put labels on everything it seems. When I look back at my childhood and analyze it, I could probably put many labels on my behaviors that would scare the hell out of me if I was adopting myself (silly thought). My better half would say that I came out just fine. Ms. Gray does a good job at showing examples, what was done and the outcome. I’m enjoying the book immensely.
There are a couple of boards that I like to visit on a regular basis:
Frau (Families for Russian and Ukrainian Adoptons) chat
Yahoo Group Adoption_from_Ukraine - Membersip
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Adoption_from_Ukraine/
The web sites are just too numerous to put here, but here are some to get you started:
USCIS - http://www.uscis.gov/portal/site/uscis
US Embassy in
AdoptLove blog - http://www.adoptlove.com/blog/
US Dept of State - http://travel.state.gov/family/adoption/country/country_369.html
A site listing more sites - http://www.adopting.org/adoptions/international-adoption-adopting-from-ukraine.html
Each site will lead you to other sites which lead to others ad nauseam.
One last resource that shouldn't be overlooked is a state/county run foster/special needs adoption program. We went through 36hrs of class for a local adoption in 2001. The sights we saw were very disturbing and others we reassuring and opened our eyes to many things that we hadn't considered. It's an invaluable resource for us, even after so many years.
I’ll have a blog list on this site once I get around to it.
Cheers and happy hunting J.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Post Adoption Depression
This was something that I had gleaned from earlier searches, but now holds more meaning now that we are looking at travelling. The reality of the adoption is much more real now that the dossier is in country, plenty of money spent and just a volume of time expended to get here. I'm not going to rewrite what's already been written, but I will provide a few links that I've found useful.
Don't let this information discourage you. The reality is that each adoption is different because all the individuals involved are different. This information is being presented so that you can be aware of what may happen and know that if it does, you are not alone and there are ways to get through it.
http://international.adoption.com/foreign/psychologist-post-adoption-depression.html
http://www.rainbowkids.com/expertarticledetails.aspx?id=272
http://adoptivefamilies.com/articles.php?aid=470
There are many more sites, but these should give you an idea of what PAD (Post Adoption Depression) is and how to identify it.
I hope this helps.
Don't let this information discourage you. The reality is that each adoption is different because all the individuals involved are different. This information is being presented so that you can be aware of what may happen and know that if it does, you are not alone and there are ways to get through it.
http://international.adoption.com/foreign/psychologist-post-adoption-depression.html
http://www.rainbowkids.com/expertarticledetails.aspx?id=272
http://adoptivefamilies.com/articles.php?aid=470
There are many more sites, but these should give you an idea of what PAD (Post Adoption Depression) is and how to identify it.
I hope this helps.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Timeline & Problems
I've been watching the Ukraine adoption drama unfold for some time. Once I saw the SDA (Ukraine agency responsible for international adoptions) accepting new dossiers again in Dec '06, we decided to move forward with our adoption journey. We spent a bit of time on the Internet researching agencies and facilitators. We contacted a few and decided the best answer for us was an assisted independent adoption.
Once we decided on an agency and probable facilitator, it was time to get into action. It was now time to find out what all this "dossier" stuff was. From the list, it appeared the home study would take the longest. Unfortunately, my business had me traveling through March into April; so we applied April 10th for the home study. Two years ago, there were numerous agencies in Northern Nevada that did home studies; now only Washoe County performed these in our area. Our packet arrived and we started collecting all the required paperwork. We completed it in early June and was scheduled for the in-home interviews in July. Timing was still not a problem since they said the home study could be completed in about a month (early August). This didn't happen since it seems the background check got lost in the process. The home study wasn't delivered to the USCIS until September 4. A whole month was lost, OUCH!!
Going back in time just a little, we knew that we could submit our application for the I-600A to the USCIS (formerly the INS) before the HS (home study) was completed. The background check for the USCIS could take several weeks so we submitted our application on June 27th. We were hoping that the fingerprints for the background check would be taken while we waited for the HS; no such luck. I was informed by my agency that Ukraine's quota was filling up and we needed to speed the paperwork up and try and get it in by the end of Sept. I went to our local USCIS office to expedite our application. After filing paperwork explaining our situation, they let us get our fingerprints for the background check on the following Wednesday (12th) without an appointment.
On Monday (17th), Virginia contacted the FBI fingerprinting/background section and spoke to a real person. This person confirmed that the fingerprints were received on the 12th and the background check was returned to the USCIS on the 12th (same day). From what I've read, the FBI gives priority to adoption and arrest checks. Tuesday, I was in the USCIS office trying to find out what the holdup was. The front counter agents were always courteous and helpful, though I know they were tired of seeing my face 1-2 times a week. One of the ladies looked up our background checks and printed them out. She explained that our folder would be adjudicated which could take 2-3 days. After two more visits to the local office with no status change, I was notified by mail that there was a problem with the HS. It took over a week for me to receive the letter; more time lost. Time is running out and I'm not getting much cooperation from the USCIS.
The HS was fixed and resubmitted very quickly. Our SW with the county sympathized with us and did what she could to expedite the HS. I visited the local office again and requested to pick up the I-171H when completed in person to help speed the process. I was denied the request as it's not their normal procedure. It was time to kick up the pressure a notch or two. We contacted our Congressman's office and requested help in this matter. They contacted the local USCIS office on Monday morning; I received a call Monday afternoon that my I-171H was completed and I could pick it up on Tuesday morning.
Note: Thank you Amy for the Congressman's information and may God speed your journey to Guatemala for your daughter :).
I already had all the docs back from the agency so I could get them apostilled ASAP. After picking up my I-171H, I drove to Carson City to have the docs apostilled. Well, I couldn't afford a same day expedite on the docs so I opted for a 24 hr. expedite. I sent the docs via DHL which takes 3 days. Well, I had missed a single doc in the original dossier, so off to Carson City again to repeat the process. This time I did a 4 hr expedite. Once again, the workers pitied my poor soul and got it back to me within an hour. Back to Reno and on to DHL again. This doc only took 2 days (1.5 days actual time) to get delivered; that's service.
Note on Nevada apostille expedite fees. If you don't need expediting (7-10 business days), the cost is $20 for each document. A 24hr expedite is $75 for each different notary of which I had 7 plus the apostille fee of $20 for each doc. See how fast this adds up. The 4 hr. expedite is $125, 2 hr. expedite is $500 and a 1 hr. expedite is, hold on, $1000. Now, I've read plenty of posts about whether the additional costs to expedite docs in Ukraine are fees or bribes. Does it really matter when the results are the same. For me to expedite my files, I took precedence over the normal processing of apostilles which I paid dearly for. The lesson here is not to get yourself into a situation where you have to expedite docs. If you do, then expect to pay for the privilege of faster processing. Just a reality check here.
Once we decided on an agency and probable facilitator, it was time to get into action. It was now time to find out what all this "dossier" stuff was. From the list, it appeared the home study would take the longest. Unfortunately, my business had me traveling through March into April; so we applied April 10th for the home study. Two years ago, there were numerous agencies in Northern Nevada that did home studies; now only Washoe County performed these in our area. Our packet arrived and we started collecting all the required paperwork. We completed it in early June and was scheduled for the in-home interviews in July. Timing was still not a problem since they said the home study could be completed in about a month (early August). This didn't happen since it seems the background check got lost in the process. The home study wasn't delivered to the USCIS until September 4. A whole month was lost, OUCH!!
Going back in time just a little, we knew that we could submit our application for the I-600A to the USCIS (formerly the INS) before the HS (home study) was completed. The background check for the USCIS could take several weeks so we submitted our application on June 27th. We were hoping that the fingerprints for the background check would be taken while we waited for the HS; no such luck. I was informed by my agency that Ukraine's quota was filling up and we needed to speed the paperwork up and try and get it in by the end of Sept. I went to our local USCIS office to expedite our application. After filing paperwork explaining our situation, they let us get our fingerprints for the background check on the following Wednesday (12th) without an appointment.
On Monday (17th), Virginia contacted the FBI fingerprinting/background section and spoke to a real person. This person confirmed that the fingerprints were received on the 12th and the background check was returned to the USCIS on the 12th (same day). From what I've read, the FBI gives priority to adoption and arrest checks. Tuesday, I was in the USCIS office trying to find out what the holdup was. The front counter agents were always courteous and helpful, though I know they were tired of seeing my face 1-2 times a week. One of the ladies looked up our background checks and printed them out. She explained that our folder would be adjudicated which could take 2-3 days. After two more visits to the local office with no status change, I was notified by mail that there was a problem with the HS. It took over a week for me to receive the letter; more time lost. Time is running out and I'm not getting much cooperation from the USCIS.
The HS was fixed and resubmitted very quickly. Our SW with the county sympathized with us and did what she could to expedite the HS. I visited the local office again and requested to pick up the I-171H when completed in person to help speed the process. I was denied the request as it's not their normal procedure. It was time to kick up the pressure a notch or two. We contacted our Congressman's office and requested help in this matter. They contacted the local USCIS office on Monday morning; I received a call Monday afternoon that my I-171H was completed and I could pick it up on Tuesday morning.
Note: Thank you Amy for the Congressman's information and may God speed your journey to Guatemala for your daughter :).
I already had all the docs back from the agency so I could get them apostilled ASAP. After picking up my I-171H, I drove to Carson City to have the docs apostilled. Well, I couldn't afford a same day expedite on the docs so I opted for a 24 hr. expedite. I sent the docs via DHL which takes 3 days. Well, I had missed a single doc in the original dossier, so off to Carson City again to repeat the process. This time I did a 4 hr expedite. Once again, the workers pitied my poor soul and got it back to me within an hour. Back to Reno and on to DHL again. This doc only took 2 days (1.5 days actual time) to get delivered; that's service.
Note on Nevada apostille expedite fees. If you don't need expediting (7-10 business days), the cost is $20 for each document. A 24hr expedite is $75 for each different notary of which I had 7 plus the apostille fee of $20 for each doc. See how fast this adds up. The 4 hr. expedite is $125, 2 hr. expedite is $500 and a 1 hr. expedite is, hold on, $1000. Now, I've read plenty of posts about whether the additional costs to expedite docs in Ukraine are fees or bribes. Does it really matter when the results are the same. For me to expedite my files, I took precedence over the normal processing of apostilles which I paid dearly for. The lesson here is not to get yourself into a situation where you have to expedite docs. If you do, then expect to pay for the privilege of faster processing. Just a reality check here.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Costs
Costs will vary widely depending on who you use and what services are available in your area. I will not list costs for the agency and facilitator. Not only do these change with time and services provided, but it also varies between agencies and facilitators. This post will not be all inclusive but should give you an idea as to the general costs which depended upon our situation.
Home study conducted by Washoe County Child Protection Services. They were the only game in town. $3600 - Ouch!! The highest I've seen other than ours was $2000.
I-600A $755 which included fingerprints for 3 people.
Physicals and Lab Work were mostly covered by insurance (we got a break). $70
State Background Check $150 (for 3 people)
Apostille Docs $400 ($20 for each doc with a notary)
Expedite fee for apostilling docs (24hr) $570 (Time was critical)
DHL shipping (3 day) of docs $98 x 2 shippments = $196 total
Let's not forget the misc costs such as redecorating the rooms, travel to chase down docs, time off for appointments and doc chasing. Our costs for here are nearly over unless we need to redo some of the docs.
Costs still needing to be paid:
-Travel to and from Ukraine -- about 3-4 thousand
-Facilitator
-Living expenses in Ukraine -- don't have a clue
-Bills while we are gone and not earning any money -- way too much but we need a roof when we get back
Home study conducted by Washoe County Child Protection Services. They were the only game in town. $3600 - Ouch!! The highest I've seen other than ours was $2000.
I-600A $755 which included fingerprints for 3 people.
Physicals and Lab Work were mostly covered by insurance (we got a break). $70
State Background Check $150 (for 3 people)
Apostille Docs $400 ($20 for each doc with a notary)
Expedite fee for apostilling docs (24hr) $570 (Time was critical)
DHL shipping (3 day) of docs $98 x 2 shippments = $196 total
Let's not forget the misc costs such as redecorating the rooms, travel to chase down docs, time off for appointments and doc chasing. Our costs for here are nearly over unless we need to redo some of the docs.
Costs still needing to be paid:
-Travel to and from Ukraine -- about 3-4 thousand
-Facilitator
-Living expenses in Ukraine -- don't have a clue
-Bills while we are gone and not earning any money -- way too much but we need a roof when we get back
Monday, October 22, 2007
Preamble
Hopefully a short blurb on how we got to where we are.
We've been looking into adoption for quite some time. In 2001, we tried a local adoption which did not go through (county/state switching roles, lost paperwork, etc.). When we decided to go international,
There is a timeline along the right side which will lay out the events since we started this journey. We didn’t rush in the initial stages because we didn’t want to travel before September (due to SDA closures). The wait for our I-171H is what pushed our timeline beyond September.
We decided to go independent but use an agency (About A Child) for the dossier prep and overall help in getting this journey completed. We had some issues with the Home Study and other documents that has made this money well spent. The only agency conducting home studies located near us was Washoe County Child Protection Services (gov’t org). I’ve yet to see any HS cost as much as ours, but we didn’t have much of an option.
I want to thank many individuals who’ve donated their time and energy into helping with our adoption journey. Unfortunately, the open internet is not a good place to put up a lot of names so I’ll find another way to acknowledge them.
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